Any relationship can be a challenging thing. How about a relationship where the two people speak different languages, where their cultures are dramatically different, where every move they make is under the magnifying glass of thousands of curious people?

Kuniko takes all of these challenges in stride. She doesn’t mind the looks we get when we walk hand in hand past people. She doesn’t mind that I can’t fill out the most basic of paperwork or that I stare dumbly at people when they ask the simplest questions in Japanese. One of the real joys of my life is to giggle together about some miscommunication that happens between us. Some people might get frustrated at something like that – but we find it a source for amusement.

She uses English as a foreign language almost all day long, from the time we make lunches together at five a.m. each morning, to teaching English to her students all day, and then she comes home and listens to English radio programs while chatting with me in English. She loves English, and that has been a big factor in our happiness. It is so nice for me to be able to say whatever comes off the top of my head and have her understand it. As my Japanese improves we may see a shift from English to Japanese, or to some middle ground in between. For now – the onus is on her, and she’s holding up just fine.

Kuniko’s sense of humor is what really makes it a joy to be around her. Coming from different cultures, sometimes humor is hard to pull off. We have very few shared experiences from childhood and popular culture in Japan is almost completely unknown to me. Kuniko is razor sharp, though, and her choice of words, and even the subtle pauses she’ll put into her responses will make her point and get us both laughing.

There are a lot of challenges for us ahead, but I can’t imagine making that journey with anyone else.