Last evening we drove over to Kuniko’s parents’ house to meet up before the trip to the family gravesite. Kuniko and I were running a little late, but we stopped in at Ito Yokado to pick up some pears in a very fancy box to bring over for the family. We also brought over the remains of the rolled cake that Kuniko’s friend Kayo had brought over to us.
Once we arrived we marshalled our forces and took off. Kuniko drove with her sister in the passenger seat, and me and her mom in the backseat. A funny moment happened on the way – Kuniko was listening to a CD that I had made for her a long time ago, and her sister commented in Japanese that it was a really strange song being played. Kuniko pointed out to her that it was from me, and I teased her by saying it was my favorite song. She was a little embarrassed.
Once we got to the area we parked the car outside Kuniko’s aunt and uncle’s house, and then went inside. Kuniko’s dad was already there trying to fix their television that was affected by the big thunderstorm that came through.
Kuniko’s aunt and uncle seemed to be in a bit of a rush, and they didn’t seem to be surprised that we showed up or that there was a foreigner coming along. We went inside and they served us tea, and a cold beer for me. We sat in a room dominated by an altar, with lots of fruit and other goods lined in front as an offering. There were two large pictures of the grandfather and grandmother, and Kuniko and her sister performed the prayer rituals under the watchful eyes of the family and the portraits.
I would have been really nervous if it everyone knew the ceremony perfectly, but Kuniko and her sister had to get some help, and in turn Kuniko helped me do it. I lit some incense (two sticks, not one or three) rang a bell, and prayed for the dead folks. Everybody took a turn, and then we left to walk down the street towards the local temple.
It was a few blocks away. We turned away from the main road and then walked uphill through a quiet neighborhood until we came to the gate of an old temple. By now it was dark and pretty quiet – and as we walked around the temple you could see the fairly large graveyard, with candles and dim lights burning at various places. We stopped and got some water to wash the gravestone, and then went inside.
We walked around until we found the Kageyama gravestone, and then we repeated the incense ritual, lit some candles, and washed the gravestone in turn. It was very beautiful to see all the candles and gravestones on a dark, warm night like that.
Once we finished we all headed back, and jumped back into the car. From there we went back to the parents’ house, and we had a big feast of hamburg, sashimi, salad, and rice. For dessert we worked on the roll cake, and Kuniko’s dad even opened a bottle of brandy (Remy Martin!) that he had gotten as a gift. It was really good, and I sipped on it at room temperature. The flavors were great – good vanilla and toasty flavors that covered your tongue and lingered for a long time.
Finally we hit the road and came back here. Next to the yakitori, which is about a three minute walk away) they opened a new Lawson convenience store. Convenience stores in Japan are everywhere. They are open 24 hours, they are brightly lit, and you can get anything you need at any hour of the day. So now our lives will be much more convenient with the new store. We walked over there and looked around, and got some snacks and goodies for Sunday.
No big plans for Sunday really. We’ll go back to the gravesite in the evening, but during the day we’ll probably both be studying and relaxing. I promised Kuniko that I’d make some guacamole, so we’ll be sure to have bad breath at the gravestone.
